So I breezed through a story earlier about Luke Young announcing his retirement from international football, laying the blame at England manager Fabio Capello for not giving him a fair shot. It had somehow escaped my attention that he was ever an England player, I have to admit. In fact I had to do a Wikipedia search to remind myself who he even is. Oh he's a 32 year-old full-back at QPR and hasn't played for England since 2005. This is big news right here.
Which sort of reminds me, I'm turning 32 myself quite soon, and have yet to even be shortlisted for any of Giovanni Trapattoni's Ireland squads. I mean not even the friendly against Wales earlier this year for crying out loud. Did he not see my goal against Rogers' Accounting Firm in the Boston Ski & Sports Club indoor soccer 7-a-side league earlier that month? I knew I should have had someone Youtube it.
Anyway, Trap, if you're reading this I'd like to formally announce that I no longer wish to be considered for selection. In my advancing years and declining fitness, I really need to focus more on Team PLB's relegation plight and spend more time with my cats.
Oh and Jurgen Klinsmann, if you happen to be browsing this site looking for some tactical advice as I know you do, you might be aware that I also qualify to represent the United States what with me being a citizen and all. Well I'm sorry but I'm going to have to decline your gracious offer. Can't have the likes of Landycakes moaning about us foreigners coming over and stealing all the jobs now, can we?
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